Oh good lord, Segs to Dallas??

Oh good Lords, Segs to Dallas? Now I adore Loui so part of this is really upsetting, but I also adore Tyler Seguin. Also, creepy people googling even creepier things having to do with Tyler's abs drive the most hits to this blog, so WELCOME TO DALLAS TYLER!!!!

Tyler, here are a few things to know in preparation for the move to Dallas:

1. Most of the city has no idea about hockey and may not even realize the Stars are an NHL team. Don't take offense to this - embrace it! You can go pretty much anywhere without being recognized (unless I'm there) and that is a gift. 

2. I sit in section 120 at the #AAC (This is REALLY important to know)

3. Stars players seem to love the Rangers so quickly make friends with a baseball player and you'll fit right in

4. Grapevine is the coolest part of the city and absolutely where you want to live. OK, that is a lie. But it's where I live and I have a pool so come on over for a BBQ. I even promise not to hit on you (much).

5. There are lots of girls in Dallas, lots of HOT girls, who wear very little clothing during the summer. While this is awesome (hey, I can look too) I don't want you to knock up some chick as soon as you get here so please, please use protection.

6. In order to live in Texas you must love Whataburger and Dr. Pepper. Don't ask why, it's just a Texas thing.

7. You have just increased the Stars hotness score by about 50 points so thank you for that.

Kisses!

~Saucer